Probably is the droid you're looking for, actually.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
3:58AM - [movie review] "The Incredible Hulk"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I want the Captain America movie NOW. RIGHT NOW.
That's perhaps not the idea I was supposed to leave the theater with, given that Cap is Captain Not Appearing In This Film. But The Incredible Hulk itself isn't that great. It's entertaining enough, but the directing and cinematography are lacking, the character development has some gaps, and the female roles are dire in ways that only start with the vacant look in Liv Tyler's eyes. I do appreciate that the movie assumes the audience either knows the basics of the Hulk story or is smart enough to figure out his origin from the clues provided and that no one really wants to sit through actual exposition about a fairly boring origin story, but despite its several merits it's no Iron Man,
But we get a glimpse of how Captain America will fight, once his movie gets made. It's ... it's gorgeous. No, I'm not going to spoil HOW we get that glimpse. It's easily the best-done scene in the film, and the best use of special effects in a movie filled with excellent effects.
Effects are an area in which the movie does keep up with Iron Man, in general. It doesn't look quite as natural all around as the Iron Man effects did, but Iron Man was about a guy in a shiny suit he based on his favorite penismobile. Hulk is about a guy who's twelve feet tall, six feet wide, green, and pissed about all of the above. Disbelief has a bit farther to suspend, in the latter case. What the movie does accomplish is making Hulk freaking terrifying to look at and to hear. The Hulk's first fight scene is shown from the perspective of his victims, and it's appropriately disorienting and terrifying to have something so not right attacking from nowhere with no explanation, and a voice that sounds like machinery moving.
And I want the Captain America movie now.
(By the way, don't bother sitting through the end credits.)
Friday, April 4, 2008
12:51AM - Book Review: Black Ships
Finally, after delays ranging from mumblety-mumble to look! a bunny!, and heralding my coming home to realize that my third-floor toilet had asploded while we were all at the bookstore and turned floors two and one into a rainforest, last night I held my very own copy of ![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
jo_graham's debut novel, Black Ships. Let me tell you about it, now, while my thoughts are still roiling from taking it all in.
I was lucky enough to be allowed to read a draft of this while it was being written. Holding it, though, letting its weight rest in my hands and its print sooth my eyes the way no computer screen ever can, is an experience that moves it beyond the smooth feel of a good manuscript well-edited. I'm a book nerd. So are you. In bound form, novels transcend.
Black Ships is a retelling of Virgil's Aeneid, and the first book in a chronicle of a pilgrim soul, too curious to be satisfied with what it can learn in a single life. Rather than words of a great hero or a praising bard, this story comes to us through the eyes of Pythia, a Pythia, the Pythia, a woman who is oracle and priestess to the Lady of the Dead, called Persephone and Isis and Mary in many places and many times. Gull is born a slave, the daughter of a woman taken at the first fall of Troy and raped by her captors before being given to king Nestor as a prize, already pregnant. Gull is crippled as a child, and because a slave who does not work does not eat, she is given instead into the service of She Who Was Pythia. From there, she makes her own way.
Fans of the Kushiel series will certainly find something to like here, with lush prose and a strong-minded, god-touched heroine, though significantly less in the way of kinky sex. The Lady of the Dead is both a harsher and more lenient patron than Kushiel, not threatening Her avatar with punishment or abandonment should she stray from the path, but in turn leaving the ultimate responsibility for Gull's life and choices in Gull's hands. Katherine Kurtz fans, too, will find a book that manages reincarnation at least as well as Kurtz at her best, and unlike Kurtz's books, I never want to choke any of Graham's protagonists straight through their next five lives. This is a book about good people -- flawed, human, but essentially good -- who try to make something noble and lasting in a world that is falling into despair and cruelty around them.
Most especially, though, this is a successor to the works of Mary Renault. Graham certainly hasn't yet surpassed Renault, but that's like saying that Trent Reznor hasn't yet surpassed Johnny Cash. (Shut up. I can hear you thinking blasphemy. Don't make me educate you in the error of your ways.) Her narrative is not as densely packed with meaning as Renault's, and its heartbreak does not cut so deep nor its love sing as terribly clear. It speaks more clearly, though, with characters more sympathetic and joy more uplifting. Let me say to you in truth that there is more than one birthing scene, and more than one scene about the happiness of motherhood, and it does not make me want to vomit. It makes me tear up. It makes me want to shout for the victory. It makes me act in ways, in otherwords, entirely unlike myself. This book changes me while I'm reading it, and stays with me after.
When I grow up, I still want to be an astronaut and also Godzilla, or Godzilla who IS an astronaut, but on the way can I be Jo Graham for a little bit?
(The toilet calamity happened while we were out specifically on a Jo Graham-and-Jim Butcher run. I sense a conspiracy. Somewhere.)
Sunday, March 23, 2008
7:54AM - Torchwood 2.11 "Adrift"
So the moral is ... Torchwood's budget can't cover a couple of work-experience boys with a bucket of paint and some duct tape. Also, Jack can't fucking spit it out (That's what he said), Rhys has a spine, Gwen can go an episode without being a cheating bitch, Ianto's a handjob enthusiast, saving the world is no excuse for not wanting to get knocked up right at the moment, and when you get right down to it, people are happier when they're ignorant and frightened.
In conclusion, needs more naked gay time.
6:59AM - Halp! Halp!
Have developed minor raging fiction-crush on Archie Goodwin. Am terrified to poke the fandom because I know there's going to be fics where Archie and Wolfe do the buttsexes. Cannot live with that in brain.
(Also, Timothy Hutton = BHILF. Basset Hound I'd Like to Fuck.)
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
3:42AM - Dug out some old games.
The original Super Mario Brothers: still kicking my ass after all these years.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
3:23AM - *makes popcorn*
Hooboy. LJ's finally put up [Bad username: http://www.livejournal.com/abuse/policy.bml?proposal=1]proposed policies.</i>
In before (or, really, not): What about the Christian child abuse crazy groups, what about fanfic, what about doodles, what about what about what about?
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
6:00AM - Ambitions re: Torchwood
Some day in the future, when I'm not a lazy slub and my head has stopped spinning and children play with their puppies under clean, safe skies, I'm going to run a Torchwood challenge that badly needs run.
Fandom, I ask you: where is the great repository of Jack's baby-daddy fic? Come one, really. You don't have to write the mpreg, but where's the rampant speculation on who knocked him up? What happened to the baby? Who got custody? I mean, the Grey thing turned out to be a big red herring -- while I'm not ruling out the possibility that he's his brother's mother, given that this is Jack, it does seem less likely to be so.
Sure, you can go the easy route and say that he's Susan's grandma, but hardly anyone does that, either. Some day, I'm going to run the Jack's Baby-Daddy fic challenge, and it will be glorious, oh yes.
(Obviously, the father is the Tree of Korval.)
Sunday, February 24, 2008
6:09AM - I'm SUPPOSED to be asleep.
Are there any happy AUs for "Captain Jack Harkness" that have at least a passing familiarity with spellcheck? Any? My retinas would really like to know.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
4:00PM - Flipping through old files.
Managed to waste the day, miss my therapy appointment, and generate nightmares that freaked even me out. I feel accomplished. In celebration, I went through my old-old WIP stack, mostly because I want something to talk about. I don't know why I'm in a talky mood lately. You've all seen what I've been like. Here, accoutns on other services, message board handles, email ... I just haven't felt like talking to the Internet; haven't had the energy to find anything to say.
Well, I do know why I've been thinking of this story. We've tied down the one housemate who hasn't seen Babylon 5 and taped his eyes open in front of the dvd player. I remember how much I love this show. This is nominally Susan/Talia, though really it's just Talia hating on Lyta, PG, and the start of a short story AU taking off from "Divided Loyalties." There's more to the story written, but this is the only part I don't want to punch in the face. I get frustrated every time I look at the file, for two reasons. One, I keep changing my mind about what effect Talia staying would have on the universe, on Susan and Michael and Marcus, and on the Shadow War and Lyta's relationship with the Vorlons. Second reason is that the writing style just gets more pretentious from here on out.
( There is a rash in her mind where Lyta Alexander had been. )
2:56AM - HOLY F@#$@#$ SH@@$@ GR%#^& CLM%&#%^& !!!!!
I JUST SUBMITTED MY RE-APPLICATION TO COLLEGE. UPLOADED THE ESSAY. PAID THE FEE.
HAVEN'T TOUCHED COLLEGE SINCE 2005.
GONNA DIE NOW.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
2:39AM - Torchwood 2.06, "Dead Man Walking"
( Spoilers! Also a lot of Owen-related tangents, because I've fallen for the creepy little fuck. )
Words cannot express how happy it makes me that Torchwood Cardiff has a code worked out with the police for "No, seriously, let our drunken asses out of here before the Weevils figure out you taste like butter. Yes, really, you do taste of butter. No, can't explain it. Classified." Always prepared, Team Torchwood.
Yes, technically that's a spoiler, too. But it's classified.
Martha and Toshiko have yet to have sex. v. disappointed, Torchwood. V. DISAPPOINTED. >:-[
Sunday, February 17, 2008
7:55AM - But what will the neighbors think?
Isn't Torchwood worried, even just a little, that someone will notice the water tower in the plaza is full of repiped pterodactyl pee?
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
5:59AM - Steampunk Power Rangers.
STEAMPUNK. POWER. RANGERS.
"In the Victorian language of flowers, or floriography, a pink carnation was a symbol of a woman's love, whereas white was a clear sign of her disdain: two warnings any gentleman was wise to heed. [...] the yellow yellow rose, as a symbol of unbreakable friendship, stood in contrast to the marigold's boasting of suffering endured."
Because this_is_tab is the coolest best friend artist childhood entertainment fan who I used to go ghost poking with EVER.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
5:20PM - THERE IS NO GOD!
http://www.slashfic.co.uk/#toill
Why? Why this instead of sleep? Why?
Thursday, January 17, 2008
1:49AM - Got laid off!
I'll be -- okay, I probably won't be online more, or any more productive in any facet of life, because I do have to find myself another job, and I've got this sleep thing going on that I'm going to badger my doctor about before my benefits cease to work. But I'm free! Free! No more suburban commutes for me!
(My next job will, of course, be in the suburbs, as punishment for that statement.)
Monday, January 14, 2008
3:10AM - [fic-ish] The Authority/X-men movieverse, little plot, PG-ish rating, dubious geography
Okay. Here's my excuse. A long time ago -- no, really, a long damn time ago -- I posted the prologue to an Authority/X-men movieverse crossover. It sucked. I'm not linking it. In fact, I have no idea what you're talking about. I wasn't there.cyanide_lollies, damn her googly eyes, found it and commented on it, which reminded me of 1.) how much my writing sucked, back in the day ... when I was scribbling fic out on a handy rock ... that I'd found ... while running away from velociraptors ... look, those bastards are FAST, okay, and sometimes you've to to sacrifice quality for NOT BEING EATEN 2.) how much fun the plot for it was in my head 3.) that I'd resolved a few months ago to embrace my suck and the fact I never finish things I start, and instead to write the fun bits that make me giggle and to hell with writing a coherent and complete story.
This would be one of the fun bits.
What you need to know: A couple of months post X-2, absolutely and utterly ignoring every loathsome molecule of X-3 except for how terrifically gay Xavier and Magneto were. Right in the middle of the eleventh issue of The Authority: Revolution, when Midnighter's a mind-controlled ass-kicker zombie and Bendix is using him to fight the Authority and the Authority is afraid they'll have to kill Midnighter to stop him.
Jenny Quantum is not having with that.
She does a thingy. She and Midnighter take a rough ride through a whole lot of dimensions and wind up in the back yard of the Xavier School. In 2003. In the mud of a melting early-ish snowfall, under a steel-grey sky, near what was a football game til a crazy guy built like a tank and dressed like a fetish bar that had been hit by an ambulance interrupted and Rogue had the sense to haul kids inside. Wolverine jumped in. Things got messy, and then stabby, which made them more messy, and then kind of impaley.
Jenny was displeased. Wolverine will possibly have some memory of how displeased, once the bits of his skull she rearranged grow back.
( What happens next: a fuzzy elf meets a quantum singularity. )
Again, don't expect a plot, or a finished product, or any sense of shame. Do expect me to giggle madly and fanservice like an anime studio behind on its monthly cleavage quota.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
3:31AM - A palliative for the common cold (not mine).
Wild Wild West season 2 DVDs: found
Two episodes of amazing homogayness: watched
Rabid teenage crush on Ross Martin: reawakened
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
12:52PM - Yuletide recs! Set one of however many I get to.
Oh, lordy. Over 2000 fics and not the New Year yet. No way I'm doing my customary read-through of all the master list, stopping at every fandom I halfway recognize and a few I don't. Recs lists are going to be important this year. Speak to me, my sisters! Tell me what to read, and I'll tell you the same.
In the Hills As Soldiers and Shepherds, Sharpe series (more film than book): Written for MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I think I've been incredibly lucky these two years I've done Yuletide. Both stories I've received have been ones I can legitimately recommend and squee over to others, not just for the sake of politeness in accepting a gift. Both this year and the last managed to be precisely what I'd wanted, precisely what I'd asked for and more. This one has an utterly fantastic Harper voice, and Teresa being awesome, and both of them loving Sharpe beyond reason or safety (it's a gen story, for those who are curious, which makes the love and loyalty displayed even more intense without the easy crutch of smut to prop it up), and a PLOT!
The Policeman Officer's Seduction, Hot Fuzz (slash, Danny/Nicholas): There is a lot of Hot Fuzz fic this year, which I expected. What I didn't expect is that so much of it is good. Very good. Starting with this one, which is at the top when I pull up the list for the fandom. It's what happens when Danny decides to do when Nick persists in not taking the hint, and is funny and cute and very in-character. (That said, I recommend we as fandom take a vote on a referendum to ban references to skid marks in fics that also contain or lead up to sex we're supposed to cheer for.)
Beast, Reign of Fire (gen, Quinn): Possibly the first story in this fandom I've read that isn't slash. Not that I dislike the slash stories (come on, this is me, and the usual pairing involves Christian Bale and Gerard Butler), but variety is good. This is an intensely personal look at Quinn and his thoughts on the dragon war. It really does boil down to, as the movie did, Quinn feeling at his core that it's all about him -- and I still feel for him. Deftly written.
Bend Hard, Hot Fuzz (slash, Danny/Nicholas): Gay action heroes! It's very modern!
Direct Evidence, Hot Fuzz (gen): Nicholas' week in beautiful, peaceful Sandford. Lolz.
Naamah's Token Kushiel's Legacy (Nicola/Phedre, explicit): I'll thank the author properly come the reveal. For now, I'm thanking artaxastra for requesting this so that we can all share the happy. It's pretty. It's almost believable as a deleted scene from canon -- the author's grip on Phedre's voice stumbles slightly here and there, but then again, so does Jacqueline Carey's grip -- and is hot like fire. Hot like melted wax, even! The story takes place early in the ten years between Chosen and Avatar, and tells how and why Phedre gave a lover's token ... and what Joscelin did about it. It plays with d'Angeline mythology deftly enough that I'm not now sure if the story about Kushiel and Azza dicing for Naamah's favors is taken from the books or made up by the author of the fic.
Winter Words, Robin McKinley's Damar (het, Harry/Corlath): Speaking of pretty. This is a story about communication: namely, how Harry and Corlath learned to do it. It works with the language of the Hills and the language kelar speaks to those blighted and blessed with it.
A Vote for Survial, Liaden universe (Val/Miri, spoilers for I Dare): First Liaden fanfic I've ever read. I was always somewhat reluctant to go looking, given that the canon itself tends to dive into mythic incoherency every third book or so. This story, however, is short, sweet, and well-voiced, and following up on a loose bit of canon. It also manages to deal with a certain topic in a romance novel setting (let's face it, that's what these books are) in a non-creepy way, which makes up for a lot of trauma I've taken over the years. (Anne McCaffrey, you have a lot ot answer for.)
*looks around* Uh, anyone want some food beamed to them? We're having a couple fewer people than I thought at dinner, and I haven't even cooked the shrimp etouffee yet, and the food is, um. Help.
Friday, November 30, 2007
1:36PM - Oh, Blasphemy.
New LJ feature, y'all.
It's not a bad idea. The ability to set adult filters automatically is very useful, and I imagine it relieves a lot of people. Me, I remember what I got into as an Internet teeny and I thoroughly support kids becoming free agents in their own corruption, but many people get uncomfortable with the idea. This sounds like a (relatively) simple fix ... were it voluntary.
I'm marking time til it gets most thoroughly cocked up.
Bets on whose smutty fic gets reported first?
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